WHY COULDN’T THE GRADUATE STUDENTS FIND JOB?
Why have we tried to enter the university so much since our childhood? Why do people give importance the universities so much? In generally, I know that everybody answers these questions as for future and finding job easily. But a lot of students couldn’t find job in our country after they graduate. All right! Why couldn’t they find job?
Firstly, universities take a lot of students for some departments. Students are also choosing these particular departments. Therefore; lots of students graduate from these departments. For example; in our country students prefer mostly like sociology, philosophy, water products etc. departments because these departments take students with low score. Students who have low score prefer to study in these departments. If they graduate, there are so many students who graduate from these departments. So students couldn’t find job easily after graduate.
Secondly, every people who graduate from university don’t make their own job so that they encounter some problems while they search job which is related to their own departments which they graduate. For example; a teacher can work in another job if s/he isn’t appointed. Another example; in our country a veterinarian can work as food engineer instead of people who graduate from food engineer department. Or people who graduate from sociology or psychology are appointed at schools as guidance teacher. Of course; a lot of people have a complaint against these situations. Because they couldn’t find job after they graduate from university because of these problems.
And lastly; people who reach the retirement age aren’t being retired. Because; mostly people who reach the retirement age have a family. And they are responsible for their family. They have to look for them and they have to interested in their necessities. In order to these, they need to money. For money, they have to work. So people who reach the retirement age don’t want to retire because they couldn’t earn enough money if they retired. Because of this situation, people who graduate from university couldn’t find job so that they take place of retired person.
Briefly; lots of people are unemployed nowadays in our country although they graduate from university. And also there are a lot of causes about this problem. I think; our government should find a solution no more for this problem.
hi betül
YanıtlaSilyour organization is good, but I think there are some mistakes about grammar and punctuation. you should put comma before but or because instead of dot." In generally, I know that everybody answers these questions as for future and finding job easily.But a lot of students couldn’t find job in our country after they graduate." ın this sentence, you can use comma rather than dot, and if you use "prefer" before verb, you should use -ing form of the verb instead of using like this sentence" Students who have low score prefer to study in these departments." you can say prefer studying,,,. In terms of content, your essay is ok. thanks :)
Hi Betül:
YanıtlaSilI like your essay and your topic.Organization is good.There are some grammatical mistakes such as "every people who graduate from university don’t make their own", "have to interested"..Lastly,conjuction usage (but,so,because,and) isn't satisfactory.Anyway,thanks for writing.